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9. If I'm not listening to you, it's because you're boring. Do something interesting instead.
8. Meat that comes in a can can't be trusted.

7. If you're fluffy enough, no one notices the weight gain.
6. If the litter box is full, someone WILL come along and clean it. Just wait it out.
5. Don't bite the hand that feeds you. Bite the foot instead. Then run away very fast.
4. No matter what that large, slobbery dude next door tries to tell you, it's not bones he is burying in his backyard.

3. The cuter you are, the badder you can be.
2. When someone squirts you in the face you will stop doing whatever you were doing.

(one final note: Ive also learned that my husband isn't a huge fan of cats. eek!)
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